As part of my drive towards improving my health and well-being, I took advantage of the sunshine this morning to dust down my homemade bo stick and did some gentle drills after not doing any drills for the past three months. I remembered some moves from my martial arts training (Tang Soo Do) and found a lot of other stuff on-line. When I say homemade, I mean I stripped the bark from a stick and sanded it down. That level of DIY is pretty good for me.
And talking of sticks, I thought today I would write something about sticking. By this I mean how difficult it can be to stick to those important changes we want to make. Here we are looking at a key stage of the change cycle – maintenance. No, not cycle maintenance – this is a reference to the Stages of Change model proposed by Prochaska and DiClemente that is widely used in the area of behavioural change (e.g., eating habits, drinking, gambling, smoking, and other health related behaviours).
You may have had a long journey to get to the point of making changes, but the hard part is really to stick at it and keep it going. How many New Year’s resolutions seem to have been watered down or binned by the time February comes around? If this is you, then congratulations – you are clearly not a robot! Relapsing really is the norm. As we learn more about the reasons why people relapse, so we can develop strategies to reduce the risk or minimise the impact if it does occur. While there are some general principles, I think relapsing is a very idiosyncratic phenomenon, and only you through personal experience are in a position to know how it works for you – recognising what helps you stick to your changes and what are the risk factors that threaten to knock you off course,
We should remember that alcohol is a psychoactive substance – one that leads to changes in one’s thinking, feelings and behaviour. Apart from perhaps enjoying the taste of the drink and deriving pleasure from the social aspects of engaging in a shared activity, we drink in order to experience these changes. The extent to which these elements (cognition, affect and behaviour, psychologically speaking) are changed depends on a number of factors – e.g., our expectations, the environment we are in, and how much and how quickly we drink. There is a strong placebo element to drinking – if you believe you are drinking alcohol then you will feel and behave as if you are even if you have been given something that is non-alcoholic, especially if those around you are behaving likewise. The power of belief and environment. Here’s a tip if you want to give a cheap party – make a bowl of fruity punch with lots of Russian tonic (if you can still buy this, or something similar) and tell people to “go easy” with it (thus raising expectations). Serve the punch in glasses whose rims have been smeared with vodka – this gives the little burn that will help convince your guests (who until tonight might have been your friends!) they are drinking something alcoholic.
To return to relapse factors. Firstly, there are the emotional factors – feeling lonely, upset, bored, anxious, angry or upset. These can all create a desire or urge to have a drink in order to manage the feelings. Secondly, there are the cognitive factors – thoughts along the lines of “I do miss drinking”, “I deserve a drink after this horrible day”, “Just one won’t hurt”. Thirdly, the behavioural factors that also encompass environmental factors (behaviour does not occur in a vacuum, unless you are an astronaught) – drinking being associated with having a meal, being in a certain place or with particular people, the time of day, or watching TV.
We can classify all of the above as High Risk Situations and we can develop coping strategies to manange them. The first step might be to avoid some of those situations – e.g., visiting a favourite pub or being with a certain group of people. Maybe organising our lives differently so we develop different patterns of behaviour might be helpful. Some situations will be unavoidable so we need to plan ahead how to deal with them – e.g., how to politely say no to a drink. If it is our thinking that is a problem, then learn how to challenge and change those unhelpful thoughts – the Workshops on this site may be of help in this regard. Similarly, we may need to learn how to manage unpleasant feelings rather than turning to alcohol. Trauma and difficulty in managing emotions are big factors in the development of drinking problems.
Another good way to help you stick with it is to remind yourself of the benefits you hope to accrue as a result of the changes you are making. These could be related to your physical and/or mental health (recognising these are intertwined), your finances, your relationships, or you have other goals in life that are incompatible with your current habits.
Alcohol Trivia Quiz
Yesterday’s answers:
1. UB40 had a hit with “Red, Red Wine”. [I will accept Neil Diamond who wrote the song]
2. The Volstead Act brought in Prohibition in the USA [1920 – 1933]
3. Corpse Reviver No 2 is a cocktail – you can search for the ingredients if you so wish!
Today’s questions:
1. What is or was a speakeasy?
2. Who had a hit with “Whisky in the Jar”?
3. What is a tantalus? [Extra virtual points if you know the origin!]
Thank you for reading my assorted ramblings. I hope you have enjoyed them. Please seek help from your usual sources of support if anything I have touched on today are caused you any distress. Keep safe and well – there will be another installment tomorrow.
Understand Yourself Better 